There are those among us who remember when the “real” Transformers had nothing to do with Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, or Michael Bay. This was a more innocent time, when instead of cynically trying to sell us Mountain Dew, Fords, or Burger King, Transformers was just trying to sell us some Transformers toys.
But was it that innocent? Were there hidden messages contained on the toy packages? Yes! Designed to be cut from the box with scissors (mind the dotted line!) these toys all came with “technical specs” for each Autobot or Decepticon. The specs charted their specific powers (on a downright confounding graph) and provided a brief bio.
Looking back, many of these character bios reveal some deeply troubled robots, most of whom come off as total emotional wrecks. How did we not notice this when we were kids?
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